Wake Me I'll Be Here
by CatoradeandRobbie
Summary: Set during The Survival of the Hottest. Robbie has a heart breaking secret. Will Tori and Beck be able to save him? Some Rori and Bade. Rock... friendship only
1. It All Comes Out

**This is what would happen in Beck's RV, if everyone really listened to what Robbie had to say. Set in **_**Survival of the Hottest**_**, this is what would happen if the guys weren't trapped in the RV, or didn't realize that they could've been, at least.**

**Disclaimer- I do not own Victorious so you can thank Dan Schneider for that. **

**CHAPTER ONE**

_(Robbie's Point Of View)_

We had decided that it was too hot a day to be at home, in Hollywood. So, we went to Venice Beach. It really wanted to go with the guys. Like _really._

Jade and Beck came from the truck that pulled the RV we were riding in. Cat jumped out, suddenly screaming, "Gotta pee! Gotta pee!" over and over.

"Hurry back," Beck shouted after her, as she rounded the corner to the wash house.

"KAY KAY!"

Jade looked up at her boyfriend with critical eyes. "She has the bladder of a squirrel." He nodded in agreement.

"Who's ready for beach fun?" Beck asked, jingling his keys in his hand. We all grabbed out totes in celebration, leaping for the door.

"Beck, this RV is _so _cool," Trina looked around at the walls. A sign with 'Becks Rules' hung near the door, and a pink neon longhorn hung in the corner near the vintage car stereo.

"Oh, thanks." He said back.

"And you, like, live in this?" The towel on her arm shook.

"Yeah. Well, parked in my parents' driveway." He smiled. I sat awkwardly in the corner.

I stood up and walked toward the center of the RV with a blue and pink towel in one hand, and Rex in the other. "At least you have parents," Rex sadly interjected. Everyone turned to look at us. Of course. It was my alter ego that said it out loud. But I like to think it was Rex.

"Hey! Some things are private!" I scolded, trying to deter some eyes. Trying to make it seem like something that Rex had just joked about.

"I know…" His tiny voice trailed off. He leaned into me, and I hugged him.

I really hoped that everyone would think that Rex was just saying that he was a puppet, and that he didn't have family. Beck's brow furrowed for a moment, and Jade turned away to laugh, but, it seemed that everyone _had_ taken it that way. And I had saved myself, once again.

"Hey? How come all these windows are tinted so dark?" Was Tori… diffusing the tension?

Beck shot me a worried glance, and played along with Tori's question. "Oh, 'cause my dad bought it from a rapper." He laughed; I think actually forgetting that he was just playing along.

"All the windows are made from bullet-proof glass." Jade looked me straight in the eye, probably sensing my fear.

"What rapper?" Andre pondered his hands in the pockets of his swim trunks as he looked up from a miniature juke box.

"Fat Biscuit." Beck nodded.

"_The_ Fat Biscuit?" Tori asked Beck, sounding so surprised. He must've been famous. They all know him. I guess I wouldn't have since he was so well known.

"Oh my gosh!" I stuttered out, pretending. Then, I remembered the story on the news about his weight loss. "Oh, yeah! I heard he's thin, now!" (The things I pull from memory…)

"Yeah," Tori remarked, "he had that stomach surgery."

"Aw… good for Fat Biscuit!" Trina looked at all of us as she talked.

I played around in my bag for a while. Tori was talking to Jade. Andre was looking at the old signs. Trina was fixing her makeup in the mirror on the far wall.

I felt an arm on my shoulder. I turned around to see Beck with that worried look in his eyes again. "What?" I asked, all fake and happy, pretending to have the time of my life looking for my sun screen.

"What was that all about?" His face turned from worried to worried and serious.

I kept up the act. "What do you mean?" I lifted up the small bottle of SPF 50.

"Robbie…" Beck pressed. I looked away and squeezed some of the lotion into my hand. "What Rex said, Robbie."

"Oh, yeah. I can't eat gluten. He's right." Not a lie. He had said that.

"Robbie. What Rex said about his parents— your _parents_." The word kind of stung. He crossed his arms. Tori stopped talking to Jade and walked toward.

"I don't know what you mean." I rubbed some of the white stuff into my arms.

"Robbie. Please." I looked up and Tori was talking. "If it was a joke, you wouldn't have hugged Rex like that. You'd be offended… or laughing." I guess that was true.

"Nothing. I'm okay. Nothing." The corner of my mouth twitched.

"No, Robbie, you're not okay." Beck patted my shoulder.

"Beck, stop. I don't want to talk about it." I pushed his hand away and cringed.

"Robbie!" Tori sat me down on the couch. "You have to tell us what's going on. We'll help you as best we can." She pulled me closer, almost onto her lap. The tears were streaming my cheeks. I couldn't make them stop.

"M-m-my parents are dead!" I spilled, doubling over with the pain that increased in the pit of my stomach. Everyone looked over to the three of us.

"What? Robbie!" Tori rubbed my arms, hard and fast, hoping to make the pain go away. I grabbed a pillow and screamed into it.

"Shh…Shh…Shh…" Beck grabbed my hand. I slowly picked my face up from the pillow and wiped the saltwater from my face.

"I can still… still see them going to the fancy place for dinner… and the car and even though I wasn't there, I and see the crash! The cra-a-a-ash!" I held my stomach. I felt it twinge. I felt the bile coming back up my throat.

I reached for the pink bag on the floor next to my foot. I just threw up.

"That was mine!" Trina screamed at me. I was really too busy upchucking the fruit salad I'd had for breakfast. Tori slapped her. She just looked shocked, and sat there, rubbing her cheek.

I wiped my mouth with my arm. "I'm sorry." I collapsed into Tori. I remembered all of the pain. All of the sadness. The sick feeling that hadn't gone away for years had come back again. I didn't know what to think, or do, so I just kept crying. "I'm so sorry…"

Tori wrapped me in her arms and slowly rocked me. I think the rest of them ended up going to the beach without Tori, Beck and I. I can't believe what great friends they both are. I can't believe that they cared about me so much. That they _care_ about about me—to this day.

And it's like I could cry as loud as I wanted. I could drool when I fell asleep. I could be the stupidest person in the world with them, and they would still love me. That's right. Love me.

But, there was still so much more they didn't know about me. The kinds of things that might make them hate me.

**WOW! That was my first fanfic ever! I really really really love reading it, and I just got the bright idea to write some of my own. PLEASE REVIEW!**


	2. Questions and the Truth

**Thanks for the reviews! So, I thought it would be great to interject a chapter mostly about Tori, but some about Robbie and Beck. There's a little more to Tori's side of thinking than one might know.**

**Disclaimer- I do not own Victorious so you can thank Dan Schneider for that.**

**CHAPTER TWO**

_(Tori's Point Of View)_

He was asleep, curled up tight to me. He had made me sing to him, to make him fall asleep, but I didn't mind. He reminded me of someone close to my heart, too. I was leaking tears at just the thought. We'd lost my brother to cancer when he was three and I was four. I don't really know why Robbie seemed like him, to me, because they wouldn't have looked alike.

Then again, I do dream of what Trevor's face would look like today—slender with high cheek bones, brown twinkling eyes, and cappuccino tinted skin, like mine.

I'd gone through the stages of mourning. I'd denied it. I'd cried myself to sleep about it, but kids don't get to choose whether they have a fatal cancer of not. I'm pretty much over the crying thing, though. Pretty much. But, I do still love him—and a part of me is him.

Robbie's eyes fluttered, as he turned his head. The expression on his face was suddenly aggravated—opposite from the normal peaceful sleepiness.

"I love you, Robbie," I calmly whispered, leaning over to kiss him on the forehead.

On any normal day, I wouldn't have done that, for fear of humiliation. And, on a normal day, Robbie would've blushed and passed out in front of me, and his Rex would crack a stupid joke.

I started singing, again. _Make It Shine_. My tears stopped flowing.

_You don't have to be afraid_

_To put your dreams in action._

_You're never gonna fade,_

_You'll be the main attraction…_

"Mom?" He muttered, as his eyes opened, and he grabbed for my arm. It took him a second to realize that I was Tori. But, as soon as he did, he burst into short, body racking sobs and shook me to the core.

I froze, hoping the rest of the guys were still asleep. (Seven is too many in one tiny Airstream RV.) Beck crawled across the shag carpet. His eyes met my gaze as we stood up together. He seemed to get my message through them.

Beck picked Robbie up, in his arms. "Go back to sleep, Tori." He coaxed me with his light breath into lying back down. But I quickly sat up. What kind of friend was I being? He patted my shoulder. "You've been up with him all night."

"But I wanted to, Beck." I insisted, almost pulling Robbie away from him.

"Yeah, well, I was taking a sleeping shift." His hair was flustered and messy. His eyes were flecked with that 'please, please do it' look.

I brushed my pants off. "Let me come." He sighed and opened the door with his free hand. He carried Robbie down the stairs. I inched it shut behind them. "It's not like I would've been able to sleep, anyway." I bit my lip. The purple darkness froze my blood. I wrapped the fleece around myself.

Robbie pulled his head out form between his knees, sitting on one of the plastic chairs. Beck slid his chair closer to Robbie. "W-why are you doing this?" He looked at us with bloodshot eyes, and a tear-stained face.

"Because we love you Robbie." A pause. "We love you Robbie." Coming from Beck, it sounded totally alien. I rubbed Robbie's thigh, still quizzically looking at handsome boy.

"We do Robbie, and there's nothing you can say to us that's gonna convince us that we don't."

"But… I-I'm so weird." Which, honestly, was the most truthful thing he'd said in a while, but we loved him because of that.

I laughed, looking up at the Little Dipper above us. "We're Hollywood Arts. Who _isn't _weird?" Can I help cracking a joke here and there? No. But I do think it made him feel a little better.

"Right." Beck said, as he gave me applause.

There was a moment of complete silence. All of the screaming skinny-dippers stopped howling. There were no flushes in the wash house. I felt like the world was listening to us. Listening to Robbie.

"What is _really_ going on, Rob?" Beck actually got off the chair, and knelt in front of his friend. His best friend. "Where do you live?" Better to start with the simpler questions.

"A- at a foster home. About five minutes away from… Away from the school." He could barely finish his sentences with the breath he was on.

"So you, like, live with a family?" I didn't know. You can't call me clueless or naïve, because _I didn't know_.

"No. There aren't that many foster families that want to take in teenage boys. I live at a big house, and there are about… twenty boys there."

Beck sat in his seat again, but never once took his eyes off of Robbie, nor let go of his hand. "Why's it so hard to find families?" Beck was always the kind to ask uncomfortable questions, even if sometimes it looked like he was just trying to make the person uncomfortable.

"Because most of them are trouble makers. Most of them don't have parents that take care of them, 'cause they're in jail or on drugs. They all steal stuff all the time… and they…" Robbie choked a second.

"And they smoke, and get into fights, and stay up after curfew." (How that last one fits in there… that's just Robbie's head.) "They scare me so bad sometimes—and to think that people think I'm like them…"

I patted his shoulder, and combed through his hair. "You're different than them, Robbie. Your parents loved you. I-I mean they still—"

"You don't have to talk about them like they're here. Tori, Beck, I know what happened to them." Beck and I just stared at each other for a few moments, trying to wrap our brains around what he'd just said. Robbie's face went from angry back to near tears.

Beck bounced back from it quicker than I did. "Do you like the… home?"

"It's okay." Robbie looked at the ground.

"Rob." Beck urged him to tell the truth. "C'mon."

"I hate it. More than anything! Almost more than…" Losing his parents. That's what he was going to say. "But there's nothing that's gonna change it. I'm gonna be in there until I'm eighteen, or at least until I can support myself."

I wanted to speak up. To say something about it. To be the hero and invite him to stay at my house. But I couldn't. I couldn't risk having my parents say no, or worse, getting in trouble for offering. It was one of the more selfish things I've done. I should've done something.

But, I'm glad I didn't. It would've meant things would be a lot harder than what they actually turned out to be.

**Done with number two! Um… That turned out a lot different than I actually thought. (Happens sometimes I guess) But I really hoped you enjoyed the background on Tori, but not to fear. More Rori romance yet to come. PLEASE REVIEW!**

**P.S. The next chapter will be in Beck's point of view. Look forward to it…**


	3. Familiar Strangers

**Chapter Three… Finally! It may seem like giving this a T rating is a little too cautious, but in this, and future chapters will tell you why. Also, thanks for the REVIEWS!**

**So this chapter is Beck's turn. He may have a little of his own thing to say. And, what **_**really**_** goes on where Robbie lives?**

**Disclaimer- I do not own Victorious so you can thank Dan Schneider for that.**

**CHAPTER THREE**

_(Beck's Point Of View)_

Something buzzed in my pocket. I took my phone out. A call from Tori. I pressed talk.

"Yeah?" I was tired—no, I was _exhausted_. We spent another day at the beach before going home that night. I was lying on my couch the next morning, not once regretting never actually seeing the ocean front.

"We need to do something today. Beck, it's really important." She sounded so urgent, so ready to jump in front of a bus and save somebody. I was still in my underwear, and barely waking up, even with three cups of coffee.

"And that would be…?"

"We need to go see Robbie." I didn't want to argue with that. I mean, I needed a stress free Sunday as much as the next guy, but Robbie needed one, too. More than the two of us did.

"Kay." I stood up and stretched. "Be at my house in ten minutes."

"Sure thing, macho man." I could almost feel her smile at her own joke behind the phone. I hung up and ran up the stairs to get clothes on.

We were eventually walking, side-by-side. No, not romantic and all that, I was in love with Jade. We didn't really have any idea where the home was, but somehow, we found it. It was a huge brick building. Though big, it didn't look anywhere near big enough to house twenty boys like Robbie had said.

Tori opened the door and we walked inside. Somehow, I half expected to see a bunch of happy little boys running around, playing tag, and a stressed out woman standing in the corner with messy hair. But that was a daycare.

I walked up to the front desk. "We'd like to see Robbie Shapiro, please." Tori's innocent smile suddenly reminded me why we were there.

"Sure thing, sweetie." The heavyset woman clicked through several computer screens. I couldn't help but tapping my finger, impatiently, on the counter top. Tori covered my hand with hers, a closed- mouthed way of telling me to cut it out.

"Room Five, honey, that's just straight ahead, and make a left."

"Thanks so much."

"You're quite welcome. You know, this Robbie, he doesn't get too many visitors. Not in the last year, anyway."

"We just recently found out he's in here. Never had the courage to tell us."

"He's different, though. He's sweet, nice. You're a lucky girl." The woman winked and closed the window." I could tell that Tori didn't want me to know she liked Rob. I could _tell_. It was in her eyes every time she saw him. (Most times) And, I saw the kiss she gave him that night in the RV. She was in love with Robbie Shapiro.

"Let's go find Rob." She almost rolled her eyes, hoping that I didn't hear what the woman had said. But, I'm Beck Oliver. Of course I heard.

"Sure thing." I smiled back.

I knocked lightly on the oak door. There was a 'five' at eye level, and a party going on in the dorm across from it. A boy opened the door. He was tattooed from head to toe. I was actually still trying to figure out if they were real when his eyes diverted from my face to Tori's. She chewed on the inside of her cheek, and backed away, to avoid him.

Soon enough, though, he let us in. Three creepers and Robbie—that's quite a count. "Who's this pretty one, Puppet?" Great. A pet name. Robbie's life looked a whole lot worse starting then.

His eyes flashed to me, then to Tori, and then back at the floor. He whimpered. The boy's hand clenched Tori's arm, so tight, that if she pulled out, her arm wouldn't come with her. A scream escaped her glossed mouth.

"Who is she?" The guy yelled at Rob, almost like a drill sergeant. His grip seemed to _tighten_, if that's even possible.

"H-her name's Tori," He stuttered, turning ghost pale. I rolled my eyes to myself. _This can't actually be happening_, I thought. _Wait? Why am I just standing here?_ I self-criticize. So what. Big deal.

His nasty gaze turned back to her. "Now…" He sensually ran a finger from his other hand down the side of her cheek. Another kid came up from behind and clamped her mouth shut. "Now, Tori…" He was being so provocative, I wanted to punch him. But why didn't I?

I don't know if I was scared, terrified, peeing myself, or just plain frozen. I don't think I'll ever know.

"Tori, Tori, Tori… What to do with pretty little Tori…" Robbie was doubled over in pain all of a sudden. But he hadn't been touched. That's just what he did when he was scared. "I know!" Like the vile thing actually had the best idea ever, or something.

Tori breathed on edge, like she was about to die. I didn't know if she was.

"Yes…" A malicious laugh. "Now, tell me, sweetheart, are you a virgin?" She swallowed hard and nodded silently. "Yeah? Alright, then. We'll get you some sweet lovin' if you just…"

From out of nowhere, my reflexes kicked back in. I growled and dove on him. "I _really_ would appreciate if you'd leave her alone!" Really appreciate? Really? I didn't have the worst grammar…

I knocked him down with one punch. He held his jaw. "She's yours?" He'd calmed down, maybe finally seeing that I was equally matched to his toughness.

"No," Robbie called from across the room, saving me another breath. "She's mine." I nodded approvingly. _I_ didn't even know if I deserved a girl as sweet as Tori. But Robbie? He definitely did.

"Yeah, right!" Another guy yelled.

"Prove it, Puppet."

Tori got up from the floor, and shakily grabbed Robbie's arm. "Kiss me…" She whispered, barely audible.

And so he did. Passionately. The way that Jade and I kissed. I sort of turned my head, you know, not wanting to be a Sinjin-like perv.

"I love you Robbie. I really really do." She smiled. I couldn't believe the look of calmness on his face. He smiled at her.

"I love—"

The boy with the tattoos cut him off. "Well, well. So puppet _isn't_ a fag after all. Would've never guessed how _this _would turn out…" It was so sarcastic, I wanted to punch him again. And again, and again and again. Until he couldn't hurt Tori again. Or, hurt Robbie again.

So, I did. He was knocked out. Only for a second, though. By the time we'd reached the door, his cronies had beaten Rob to pulp that was curled in fetal position again. "What is it going to take for you not to hurt him again?" I plainly asked, cringing as Robbie curled tighter and tighter into a ball.

"Cash. Serious cash." What? Was I _negotiating_ with them? They were druggies! I was Beck Oliver, but, then again, what was I supposed to do?

"How much?" Robbie's eyes turned toward me, and his afro shook a simple 'No'.

"All you got." I handed three hundred dollar bills, reluctantly, to the guy. He had that creepy ear-to-ear grin. Robbie swatted the cash out of my hand.

"You can't do that, Beck!" He was suddenly breathing hard. "Just get out! Don't ever come here again!"

"C'mon, Robbie, I love you. Please. Come with us!" Tori's pleas even pierced through me.

"I never, ever want to see you again! I hate you! Just go!" Her whole body trembled. I whisked her around and took her with me.

I stopped before opening the door. "We understand, Rob. We love you. We're sorry." My face was just frozen into shock. I couldn't wipe off the surreal feeling that Robbie had actually 'unfriended' us. Tori and I walked out. Laughing resumed behind the door. I didn't want to think of what they did to him when no one was around. I didn't want to know.

She looked at me with tears in her eyes. "Thanks so much, Beck, I've never been so scared." Her lip quivered. I wrapped her in a tight hug.

"I'll never let anyone get close enough to do that to you ever again." Was I being over protective? Yes. But I wasn't going to let Tori stray from me too.

And I wasn't going to let Rob go without a fight. I was my turn to step up. To be a man.

**Another one done! So, yeah. You maybe see now what I mean.**

**But anyway, I really hope you like this story, and things are about to get **_**really**_** interesting from Rob's POV. Oh! And REVIEW!**


	4. Falling

**Okay, now for Puppet Boy. This chapter is interesting… just read it. You'll figure out why I'm not giving you hints. Plus, forgive the ages. And thanks for REVIEWING!**

**Disclaimer- I do not own Victorious so you can thank Dan Schneider for that.**

_(Robbie's Point Of View)_

I'd seen a lot in almost sixteen years. I'd been to a lot of places. Loved a lot of people.

But no one as much as I love Tori Vega.

And I told her off for coming to see me—doing the nicest thing that anyone had done for me in the longest time. I told her off for caring, for being who she was, sweet and nice. Perfect. Perfect for somebody else.

She was never going to want me back, and I had to face facts. I had really loved sharing that twenty-two second kiss with her. After what Emanuel did to her, I don't know if she'll ever trust men again. Not me. Not Beck. Not Andre. Not Sinjin.

Well, maybe Beck. He saved her.

And never Sinjin. Nobody trusted him.

But not me. I told her off.

And, forgive me for loving her, but I couldn't take those words back. I couldn't ever tell her what I really wanted to.

They replayed in my mind that night, _"C'mon, Robbie, I love you. Please. Come with us!" She'd said. And I told her "I never, ever want to see you again! I hate you! Just go!"…_

It echoed in my mind over and over and over. I just wanted to say sorry one last time. That's why I pushed them away. I didn't want them to get too close, because of this moment. I didn't want them to have to love a dead Robbie.

It was time. Time for it to all go away. I grabbed a piece of paper off my desk, and a pen from my ear.

The three were asleep. They'd hit me, and smashed me against the wall. That was the last straw. After that, it wasn't worth living for anymore.

I started writing:

_Forgive me. All of you._

_I can't help but to do this. Argue whatever you want. I can't change what I did, what I have done, most of the things you don't know. It's my time. I want to see my Mom and Dad again. And be with them forever. I want to tell them that I love them at least one more time._

_Andre, Cat, Jade, (And if Trina cares), I'm sure, by now, Beck and Tori have told you what's going on. And it seems like you don't care at all, so I don't even know why you would be reading this. Maybe you don't know how to care. Well, I'll tell you this, I __**don't **__care anymore. I just want it all to go away. I'm sorry if you wanted to say goodbye._

_Andre, you were a great friend. The things you did, the things you will do. Carry my casket, would you? Be close to me one last time. All the best wishes to you of becoming a musician. With you, it just works out._

_Cat, you're cute, and pretty, and you always know just how to make me laugh. I want you to sing to me at the ceremony. I want you to give me the best farewells. And the best of wishes to you of becoming whatever it is you want to be. With you, it's always changing._

_ Jade, I know, really, that you don't hate me. I'm annoying, I get it. But, I want you to be at my funeral. I just want to know that you care. With you, it's always on the edge._

_Beck and Tori, I know you love me. And I did some things to you that I'll never be able to take back. Especially Tori._

_Tori, I love you, and up until the moment when I'm gone, I will love you. I am spewing sorry all over this page as I write about telling you off. As I write about what Emanuel did to you. As I write about our kiss meant to last a lifetime. I want you to dress me for the last time. Make sure I match. I wish you all the best wishes of becoming a big star. With you, it's always easy._

_ And, Tori, if you think it's all your fault for coming, it's not. And my regret isn't why I'm doing this. It is more a matter of the things I didn't tell you about my life. And as you examine my dead body, and my past things, you'll know why._

_ Beck, you're the brother I never had. I want you to have Rex. You'll take care of him just as well as I did. All the best wishes of becoming an actor. You'll make it out there, Beck, I guarantee. Just tell them I'm listening. With you, it's always the best of times. The best life any person could've ever had given to them._

_Don't let yourselves cry too much over me. Arrange a funeral. Bury me. But don't cry, guys._

_I truly love you all, but I'm not worth it._

_Never would've been, either._

_- I know you'll all be famous._

_Just don't do it for me,_

_Robbie Shapiro_

All the anger, the rage, the sadness had come back writing the letter. But no second thoughts. I took one deep breath and tucked it in my shirt pocket. I kissed Rex goodbye, and opened the door of the dorm. It wasn't the surface type of pain anymore. It was the deep, hollowing pain that would never go away. The kind that ate you alive. It would've killed me, so what was the point in waiting?

I opened the door to the roof, yes, this building had a door to the roof. I walked slowly up to the edge. A long fall. A very long fall. The kind that could kill a person. That was just what I needed.

Without another quick glance, I leapt from the edge of the building. The dead of night surrounded me, and I felt weightless. Slowly falling to the Earth, as I wished it would end a whole lot sooner. It felt like forever, just floating in midnight air, as time stopped. I whispered a goodbye.

And there I was. Falling, falling, falling, falling, falling, falling…. thinking, _what is it like to die?_

**So, sorry to all y'all that wanted Robbie to get some revenge on the other guys that tormented him. (And I've never attempted suicide, but read a very touching book about it.) But, don't worry, it's not over yet. We'll just have to see what Tori thinks when she finds him. Oh, REVIEW!**


	5. Trying to Be Alright

**How'd you like that? Well, this is about to get better. **_**Does**_** Robbie die? Even I've been trying to decide what should happen! I hope not to make you cry as hard as the last time? Or not… Thanks for the REVIEWS!**

**Disclaimer- I do not own Victorious so you can thank Dan Schneider for that.**

**Chapter Five**

_(Tori's Point Of View)_

I woke up in an icy sweat. The dreams—nightmares—had come back. I never remember them.

_Robbie_.

That was it! Robbie!

I looked over at the clock. Just past three in the morning. I pulled the covers back over me, but I still couldn't shake the feeling that something odd was going on. I decided to call Beck.

"Look, Tori, you're my good friend and all, but I really think I need some sleep here."

"Beck, don't hang up! It's important!"

"Yes, Tori? Is it yet another of your famous nightmare calls?" He mocked me.

"Beck! And, well…"

"What happened, Tor?"

"Robbie," I simply said.

"Wait! _What_?" The tone in his voice was suddenly serious—grave and serious.

I stood up and started pacing the length of my room as I rambled. "I—I guess I don't really know. I never remember the nightmares, you know, I just… Beck, it scared me."

"No offense, but isn't that what a nightmare is supposed to do?"

"I called you 'cause I thought you cared!" My voice cracked.

"Sorry… Sorry." He swallowed. "What was it about?" He cared. He genuinely cared.

"I saw Robbie, and it gave me a funny feeling that something's going on over there and…" I choked, not wanting to upset him.

"And you wanna go over there."

"Well…"

"I'll be there in five minutes. Don't freak out when a creepy in sweats knocks. He may also have messy hair."

"Are you kidding?" I laughed, trying to make myself feel a little better. "You never have bad hair!"

I could see him just freezing in a male-model type pose in front of his full length mirror. "I try."

"I'll be downstairs." I pressed a button to end to the call, and took the stairs.

And there was Beck in the car, the lights shining on the garage door. I jumped in quickly, hoping silently that my parents would stay asleep.

Minutes later, we were at the house. It was darker, bigger than I'd remembered it. The sinking feeling came back. _Robbie_, I kept playing over in my head to counteract the pain. _I live Robbie._ The car engine shut off, and I tripped over the curb getting out.

Beck ran around to the other side and caught me. "I'd rather not have to take you to the hospital, Tori. Catch a breath. Slow down. Robbie's…" his sentence was stopped short by the shrill sound of my abrupt screaming. It cut through the night air like Jade's scissors.

He grabbed the back of my shoulder as we stood over it. A tear escaped his eye; a whimper stopped my shrieks.

The blood flowed from the edge of the sidewalk to my dirty flip flop. The air got tighter and tighter and it choked my lungs. Beck's hand on my back gripped harder. His breath on the back of my neck turned to needles and ice. We inhaled.

The moment snapped, and it all came crashing down:

At the feet of us bled the body of Robbie Shapiro.

I had the strange, wild sense that one of his eyelids fluttered. Did it? I fell to my hands and knees, dissolved into a gasping, sputtering mess. Beck fell next to me. "C'mon Tori! You're making it—he's _dead_!"

The words hung in the air like snowflakes. Sharp, stinging, deadly snowflakes.

I leaned in close, and picked out a heartbeat. His cologne still lingered. My over-joy surprised me. "Wake up, Robbie!" I shook his arm. "Wake up!"

When he didn't, I fell over. The joy was gone. The sadness swallowed me whole, because it was true. True love doesn't last. I don't even know if that's what Rob and I had shared. But it was love. For sure.

"T-Tori?" I thought I heard his voice. I sat upright, and looked over my shoulder. His eyes were open. Hobo-in-the-headlights open.

Beck nodded, and I didn't even know what it meant until I took another looked at his bolt-open eyes.

He was breathing. Staring. Remembering my name.

He was alive! Freaking _alive_!

My heart skipped like a broken record. I ran and kissed him. So much like the last time—better than that time. His glassy eyes scanned my face.

"I thought you had to be dead to be in heaven," he muttered, as I stroked his bedraggled hair. "I never knew you guys were angels!" He sighed as if remembering good old times. "You were good angels to me," he leaned in and popped a smile, "and I won't tell."

"You must've hit your hear _really_ hard dude." Beck's tears glinted in car headlights.

Wait? Car headlights?

Jade ran up to us. "I knew it! I knew it! Beck? What are you doing with… _her_?" She raised a fist at me.

"Jade you don't know what's going on." He shielded Robbie's body.

She pulled out her scissors and waved them towards me. "Well, you'd best be talking 'fores your _mistress_ gets it." She was talking like I didn't have a name— an identity as a human being.

He just quietly stepped away. Her hand clapped over her mouth, and her mood changed from livid to actually caring. She just stared at Robbie. "I'm sorry, okay!" Jade snapped as she pulled out her cell. "Did you call nine-one-one yet?"

"I didn't think to…" Before I could finish, she was already on it. I turned back to Beck. "I'm sorry! I'm really sorry!"

"Hey, don't be. Robbie's gonna be alright. He'll be alright."

"What if he's not? What if he dies before he gets there? What if it's all my fault, Beck? I didn't call fast enough… I'll never be able to live with myself! It's…"

"Don't worry." It'll be alright. He stared off into the distance as the red and blue strobes came nearer and nearer. There was a flash of doubt in his voice. He hugged me, as if to finalize what he'd just finished saying. "It'll be alright."

Just by the tears in his eyes, Beck had told me a lot of things.

That Rob would live. That it wasn't my fault. That Jade was actually sorry for once. That life might possibly resume to normal.

All things except: What happened?

A bright piece of paper with writing streamed across the moonlit pavement. I bent down to pick it up.

And then it all made sense. Perfect, complete and total sense.

Well, I mean, for the most part.

**So thanks for waiting that long for me to finish this up. I didn't get enough time to update this in the past few days, but I am ready for this one. Probably one more update this weekend, and perhaps another during the week. I really sort of want to know what you guys think should happen in the end. I'm still debating. An ongoing struggle where he gets better and leaves her scarred, a quick ending where she's nursing him back to health, or somewhere else along the spectrum? Review!**


	6. Doesn't Come Easy

**Thank y'all for those reviews and suggestions. Now it's Beck's voice to be heard. So, like, I'm thinking about getting started on a new story, but I haven't even come up with a solid plot yet… I really hope you enjoy this, and a quick shout out to:**

**ZenNoMai, MaybeWolf, Jonathan 81, SuperNeos2, and Cat G! **

**You guys really make me want to update quickly! I have a goal of twenty five reviews for this story before I start on the next one, so… **

**Chapter Six**

_(Beck's Point Of View)_

I don't know if it changed Tori and I in the same way. I don't know why it had to end that way. I don't know why I had to see him lying there like that—lifeless. Eyes closed, limbs unmoving. It was one of the first times in my life I had a full breakdown.

"You're okay, Beck," Tori patted my back as she wiped the mascara from her cheeks, "He's just sleeping." The words flew out of her like birds. I knew that. I did. But having him just lying in front of us, it seemed like he was gone.

"Right," I managed to say, still sniffling. My eyes scanned the room. Robbie's social worker was the only one that wasn't in hysterics. She sat on a chair in the corner, trying to make contact with other homes and Rob's distant relatives.

Cat looked at me with big brown eyes. "I don't understand… I don't understand…" She was pacing back and forth, trying to comprehend what was really going on. "Will somebody tell me?" She yelled at the ceiling. Then stormed out. I didn't really feel like going after her.

A mumble escaped Rob's mouth. I was the first to lunge forward. It was the first he'd been awake in two days. I had to talk to him. Get some answers. The only thing he'd left us was a note that Tori wouldn't read. She wouldn't let me read it, or anybody else.

"Beck?" It was so weak and exhausted, that it wasn't even Robbie anymore.

"Yes? Robbie? I'm right here. I'm right…"

"Don't get too excited." He reached for my hand as I looked down and saw I was shaking. Really shaking.

"Why did you do it? Jump, I mean?" I said, after a few deep breaths.

His whole face changed. His eyes hardened. "Jump? I _fell_." I was so upset with the world and that night that I almost believed him. I shook the thought of it out of my head, forcing myself to stay strong.

"You didn't fall, Robbie, I see right through your lies. Just tell me. Why did you jump?" I closed my eyes and sighed at the effort it took for him to say something so simple. Was it simple?

He clamped his eyes shut. "Read the note. I left it in my pocket." He stared—his normally peaceful eyes like daggers against my skin, and the air was cold, suddenly. "I'm not sick. And I'd do it…." I didn't know what was coming after that, and I didn't want to go there.

I wheeled around, and picked the note up off the side table. Tori ripped it from my hands. "We a-aren't gonna read this… Beck." Her eyes were lost.

"He told me to. You don't have to if you don't want to."

"Okay," she sighed, looking back at Andre. His head was between his knees, and tears dripped from his eyes to the floor. "I want to. I really want to."

I unfolded the crinkled, bloody, tearstained wad of paper and read the first few lines. It read:

_Forgive me. All of you._

_I can't help but to do this. Argue whatever you want. I can't change what I did, what I have done, most of the things you don't know. It's my time. I want to see my Mom and Dad again. And be with them forever. I want to tell them that I love them at least one more time…_

I wanted to know then what I didn't know. Tori burst into tears. Maybe it was too much too soon? I folded it back up. "Keep… Keep going…"

"You sure?" She just nodded. We skimmed down to the point where it said our names, and read it aloud—but not too loud—together.

"_Beck and Tori, I know you love me. And I did some things to you that I'll never be able to take back. Especially Tori._

_Tori, I love you, and up until the moment when I'm gone, I will love you. I am spewing sorry all over this page as I write about telling you off. As I write about what Emanuel did to you. As I write about our kiss meant to last a lifetime. I want you to dress me for the last time. Make sure I match. I wish you all the best wishes of becoming a big star. With you, it's always easy._

_ And, Tori, if you think it's all your fault for coming, it's not. And my regret isn't why I'm doing this. It is more a matter of the things I didn't tell you about my life. And as you examine my dead body, and my past things, you'll know why._

_ Beck, you're the brother I never had. I want you to have Rex. You'll take care of him just as well as I did. All the best wishes of becoming an actor. You'll make it out there, Beck, I guarantee. Just tell them I'm listening. With you, it's always the best of times. The best life any person could've ever had given to them._

_Don't let yourselves cry too much over me. Arrange a funeral. Bury me. But don't cry, guys._

_I truly love you all, but I'm not worth it._

_Never would've been, either._

_- I know you'll all be famous._

_Just don't do it for me,_

_Robbie Shapiro_"

To put it plainly as possible, we were reduced to saltwater by the last line.

_BUT WHAT THE FRICK DIDN'T HE TELL US!_

I had to calm down. Stay calm. Figure out a way to suppress my anger, sadness, rage. Stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm…

Jade bent down and picked the note from my trembling hand. Her eyes widened as she began to read it. I don't know what part she was at, but it went south pretty dang fast.

Her beautiful head hit the linoleum, and Robbie even jumped up in bed.

"Jade…" I exhaled, not having the energy or life left to scream her name. I crawled over and laid her on my lap.

I couldn't, but I wanted with all my heart to wake up, or at least close my eyes, and have it all go away. Just let it all go away. Please.

**So… the next chapter will be back to Tori's point of view, skipping Robbie. Then Beck, then Tori, then Beck… It will be easier to follow that way. I hope you sort of like this story. I haven't updated a lot lately, preparing for end-of-the-year exams takes up a heck of a lot of time. REVIEW! PLEASE!**


	7. Brother and Boyfriend

**Jade West cares about Robbie. More than she thought, I guess, but the passing out was mostly from the shock that he had attempted suicide. And the shock that he knew that she liked him. Maybe a sense that it could've been her fault? Indirectly of course. Thanks for the reviews, and enjoy!**

_(Tori's Point Of View)_

He folded his arms under his blue hospital sheets. He was fully up and awake. "We could just say I don't feel well, Tori. Please don't let them take me to another one of those homes. I can't take it!" He swallowed hard, and his eyes filled with tears. I hugged him, and he sat up. I didn't really know how to make it better.

They weren't taking him to a foster home. They were taking him to Colorado Springs Psychiatric Hospital.

They were sending my boyfriend (that's what it had come to) to an insane asylum. And there was nothing I could do about it.

He was in hysterics, nearly to the point of kicking and screaming. I didn't dare tell him the truth. "Robbie… Robbie…" I kissed him on the forehead, peeling back the sweaty hair plastered there. He calmed down a little bit. "The nurse said you have to go get dressed. The social worker will be here in twenty minutes to take you to Colorado."

Truth is, Robbie wasn't crazy. Sure yeah he carried around a puppet, and he jumped off a building to end it all, but he didn't need to be in a mental ward. He'd just be stuck in there for the rest of his life. What he needed was his friends, and Hollywood Arts, and Rex, and… Robbie needed to stay in LA.

"You still love me?"

"Of course I do!" I was shocked that he would even think to ask.

"It doesn't seem like it right now! You want me to go away, right? You wanted me to die, so this whole problem would be over and you could just forget about me!"

I burst into tears. "I love you so much, Robbie. I've been trying to come up with a way for you to stay for days. But you have to. It's the law. You can't stay, but as soon as you can, I'm coming straight over there to get you and bring you home." I kissed him on the lips.

His face was sour. "Yeah." He rolled his eyes. "You don't even love me enough to come with me."

"I would if I could, Robbie." I bit my lip as it quivered. "But I'm fifteen. I can't live in an apartment by myself."

"You would if you cared."

I was a little bit offended. "It's not an option right now." I threw his clothes at him. "I just came to tell you to get dressed."

Now I realized I was getting angry at his persistence because I was going to miss him.

He stared and I turned. Beck walked in with a cup of coffee for the two of us. "Can I ask?"

"I wouldn't." I looked over. He picked up the clothes, and hobbled, slowly, to the bathroom. "But he wants me to come."

"Where would you fit in at a mental hospital?" He asked, hushed, with that smirk on his face. "Well actually…"

I punched him lightly in the stomach. I almost laughed. But a tall, blonde woman walked in. She wasn't happy-looking, or angry-looking, just blank. She held a clipboard in her hands. "Robert Shapiro?" She asked a nurse. Lucky for him, he was in the bathroom. Beck started to go crazy.

I put my hands in front of him. "Beck, it'll be okay, okay? It'll be okay!" I was swaying back and forth, trying to keep him from blowing up the entire… something.

"_Nothing_ about this is okay! Tori, our best friend—your boy friend, my practical brother—is being sent _states_ away, to hospital where he doesn't belong! Nothing will be okay, ever again. I can't live without…"

Jade was just waking up. It had been two days since her fall-slash-breakdown. "Do you have to be so freaking loud?" She held her ears like they were ringing.

"Jade…" He breathed out.

"Yeah, I'm perfectly fine Beckett Oliver, just go back to puppet boy… Robbie…" As if she suddenly remembered. "How's Robbie?" I thought it was kind of odd that she wasn't somehow intrigued by Rob's attempt. I think we all kinda figured she liked death.

"He's leaving." He looked at the floor, his eyes brimming to full with tears.

"_WHAT!_" She yelled at us. "Where the heck… Why the… Shapiro's… I don't understand!" Now her eyes were leaking. She might've denied it, but they definitely were.

I leaned in closer. "We're not telling him where exactly he's going. He doesn't need to know."

She leaned in closer. "Well where exactly is he going Vega? Where exactly _is_ he going?" She was getting angrier and angrier. I didn't know what to say. I backed up, and literally choked on all the words trying to come out.

Beck saw what was happening. He walked forward, and was nearly kissing distance from her when he said, "Colorado Springs Psychiatric Hospital." It was so quiet, I barely heard.

Her face changed immediately. "No… No… No… No… No…" I didn't exactly know why she wasn't having a party because of Robbie's departure. It didn't register.

"What's so bad about the place?" I asked, casually, but something in Jade's soulless eyes told me she was going to cry.

"My mom was sent there, and she never came back home!" She swallowed and the first Jade tears I ever saw flew from her eyes.

"Oh no…" Beck's color drained. "Hold them off for ten minutes." He grabbed his coat off the back of a chair. "I'll be back."

I didn't know what Beckett Oliver was doing, but it was something heroic; you could tell just by the tone in his voice. We weren't about to stop him. He was about to do something that was going to change all of our lives forever.

And believe me, it sure did.

**Like it? It was a little short, and kinda out there, so forgive me. But people who are suicidal have a mental issue, so going to a mental hospital isn't the most farfetched thing to come up with. And now, Jade cares even more. What's Beck gonna do about his 'brother' leaving?**

**Y'all review now, ya hear? **


	8. Aching Past

**OMG! I'm so sorry about making you guys wait, but soon, it will be summer and I'll update once a day or more. So here we are again, after the cliffhanger. So what's Beck gonna do? Or is he just… running away? Enjoy and thanks for reviewing. (Still trying to get to 25)**

**Chapter Eight**

_(Beck's Point Of View)_

"Mom?" I asked sheepishly into the phone as I tore the key into the starter, hurriedly trying to keep my word of ten minutes. I knew Tori and Jade would be busier than I, but I had to make it back for them. For Rob.

"Beckett Timothy Oliver! Where on God's earth have you been?" She was angry at me for being absent, I get it, but there were more important things, too.

"I'm okay, Mom, just listen to me." I took a deep breath.

"Of course I'm not listening," she said, with a subtle attempt at sarcasm.

I tried not to roll my eyes. "You remember Carl, right?" I remembered.

When I was eight, my parents couldn't have more kids, so they wanted to foster. For a period of two years, we had seventeen year old Carl in our house. He was sort of a downer on life (with all the drugs and alcohol going on), but I didn't judge. When you're eight, you don't judge.

I loved that Carl like a brother, and it pained me to see him go.

And then, two weeks later, I met Robbie Shapiro. And I wasn't about to let him slip from my grasp, either.

"That foster kid? Of course I remember! Carl wasn't an easy thing to forget." I could feel her smile. "What does this have to do with you being gone?"

"Can you do it again? Foster, I mean." My foot tapped nervously on the floor to the side of the brake pedal. I swallowed hard against the back of my throat, knowing all too well that my mother might not give me the positive answer I wanted.

"Beck, that's a lot to ask, I mean…. Wait…. Why would you want me to foster?"

"It's about Robbie, Mom. He needs a family or else it's…" She cut me off, mid-sentence.

"I know all about Robbie, Beck. I know what happened to his parents. I knew from the beginning. I was actually going to take him in, but I just couldn't do that—not with you and your sister so young."

I screamed to a stop at the light. "You _WHAT_?" I was mad, no, more than that. I was teeming with rage, and anger, and disgust. "You knew. All this time, you knew? And you couldn't find one spare second to tell me that my best friend's parents were dead. You couldn't tell me that I should've comforted him? That I should've stayed up with him all night?" I pounded on the steering wheel.

"Calm down Beckett, sweetie. It's alright…. It's okay…."

"No, it's not _alright_!I can't freaking believe you!" I started breathing hard. Tears leaked from my eyes.

_Don't cry,_ I told myself,_ Come on, Beck. You're sixteen. Don't cry._

"It was for your own good, Beck. I didn't want you to get hurt." She made me believe her for like a millisecond, if even that long.

"Yeah, well, you've done a darn good job of that, now haven't you?" I hated speaking to my mother like that. But she lied to me. She'd _lied_ to me. I felt the pain of it rising in the pit of my stomach. I was nauseous all of a sudden. But I couldn't throw up. Not there. Not then.

"I was planning to tell you. I was going to tell you sweetie. I was," she cooed, trying to get me off the subject. But I was adamant on getting Robbie the respect he deserved.

"Just answer my first question." I pulled into the driveway. I could see her through the blinds, talking on the phone with me. I hung up and burst through the door. She set the phone on the stand.

"You really think…" She stepped closer.

"Yes, Mom. I really _do_ think." I stepped closer.

"Alright." She looked at me with the utmost determination in her eyes. That's pretty much where I got it all from. She grabbed her purse off the counter. "Get in the car," she demanded.

I ducked my head inside the car, and buckled my seat belt. It was really happening. It was _really, truly, finally_ happening.

Robbie was going to stay. He was _freaking_ going to stay.

And If I've seen anything in life, I've seen enough to say that he deserves that one thing going right in his life. He truly did.

**Like it? Sorry it was short. It was really angst-y but I hope you like it.**

**Hey, so, I want to know what other fanfiction you guys read. Like GLEE or BIG TIME RUSH or iCARLY or whatever… I was think about writing in a different category for a try. There's no doubt that I love reading it all. **

**Review, please? For Beck, and Robbie, and Tori, and fainting Jade?**


	9. Lost and Found

**Okay, again, thanks for waiting. I've had a really busy week, trying to get my license and all, just bear with me. Plus, I've started working on a BTR story called Just Hold Me. Check it out!**

**Chapter Nine**

_(Tori's Point Of View)_

"Robbie! Stop thrashing! Please!" Robbie threw himself to the floor.

"You can't make me go!" He yelled, not particularly at anyone, but he meant it for all of us to hear. "YOU CAN'T MAKE ME GO!"

"Robbie please…" I took his hand, pulled him back up on the bed. I kissed his forehead, and, as I did, his muscles relaxed immediately. It shocked me. "Beck's coming back. I promise. I'll be there until he is."

"Well that promise didn't have to hold very long." I turned around, and looked over my shoulder. Beck. Mrs. Oliver, and in her hand, a pen.

"Beckett Oliver," I said, just fascinated. "You're such a good person. You're so good to him." Jade stood and walked to him.

"You _are_ so good, Beck. You know that? You're so good to him. I don't really… deserve you…" The last few words were so quiet… was it all in my head?

"No, Jade, don't say that." He rubbed her back as tears streamed her face. "You're a good person, too. You know it. You'd do anything for Andre, or me, or Rob, and you'd die for Cat." See? That proved it. Beck was even nice to the meanest girl alive. Though, she did seem to care about Robbie, and she did love Beck.

"You'd die for a stranger," she sobbed. "You'd give yourself up to a a person that you don't even know. You were even nice to that guy that ripped you off at that gas station!"

"It was my fault Jade, and he needed the money. I just let him have it."

"Okay… okay…" I interrupted, not wanting to hear the sweet boy and the demon girl fight any longer.

Beck nodded and reached for his mother's elbow. "Meet my mom, Robbie." They shook hands.

"Nice to meet you Mrs. Oliver." Robbie tried to smile, as his weak voice nearly fell out.

"Oh, Robbie! Just call me Lydia. Or Mom, or anything you want really. So long as it's comfortable." She paused and scanned the faces in the room. Mine. Beck's. Jade's tear-stained one. Andre and Cat had gone home, or out to a movie or something, and Trina… well I don't think Trina ever came. "

"Are you excited?" She continued, rubbing her hands together, nervously.

Robbie, confused, looked to Beck with one eyebrow cocked up, and the other looking seriously. "Um… for _what_, exactly?"

"Robbie," Beck said, starting over, "Meet my mother—your mother. Our mother." He smiled bigger than he had in days.

"Uh… huh? You'd actually want me? You'd actually want to adopt someone as messed up as me? _What_?"

"There's no reason why we wouldn't want you, Robbie. The question is: do you want us? Do you want to live with us?" Becks mom nearly shook from the anxiousness.

Robbie smiled the brightest smile I'd ever seen in my life, let alone from him. "Of course I do! I mean… Oh my God… of course I do!"

The social worker leaned over the bed with the papers to sign. With a signature, it was done.

"Well…" She smiled and gathered up her purse. "Alrighty then."

**I really hope you guys like that! Well that's the end, but there will be an epilogue added on the end. PLEASE REVIEW! It makes my day. I'll write another Victorious story if I can get more than 25 reviews. C'mon. I gave Rob a family!**

**PS- Sorry it's so short. I've had the worst time studying for tests and… well it doesn't really matter to you, so, just Read and Review!**


	10. Epilogue: I'll Always Be Here

**Last chapter you guys! Though, this isn't really a chapter, just an epilogue I kinda had planned out in my head to end it. Thanks for reviewing, but this is your last chance to help me reach 25 reviews! (I know you'll help me.) So, enjoy! For the last time…**

Epilogue

_(Beck's Point Of View)_

It's not like life resumed to normal, after that. It's not like we ended up the happiest family in the world. I guess I don't blame Rob for the nightmares, and the occasional snippiness, because he did have a hard life.

And I think, in those years at the foster home, he'd lost a sense of family—a sense of belonging to something. He forgot what a family was supposed to be.

I heard the timer on the microwave. I reached in, and took both mugs to the couch. I handed one to Robbie, and kept the other. I turned the TV on.

"So, did you have a good day?" I asked, trying to avoid the topic of… well of everything.

"It was fine." He yawned. His eyelids drooped, but he shook himself awake. "Yeah. Fine."

"If you're tired, Rob, go to bed. Don't worry about finishing that."

He looked at me with big eyes, and didn't move an inch. His lips parted, as if he was going to say something, but then, he didn't. I knew what was happening.

"The nightmares aren't real, Rob, you know that. And if they were, Rex would surely protect you. Well…" I thought about his puppet friend for a second. "Well… maybe not…"

"That's the thing, Beck," he explained, "the nightmares aren't real. But they were real. They _were_ real. I can't go back there again."

"You won't Robbie! You're an Oliver now, and nothing is ever gonna change that. In fact, you were my brother before we actually became brothers." I patted his shoulder, and took his hot chocolate to dump it down the sink.

"Yeah, thanks Beck. But I just don't…" He paused and looked away.

"You just don't what?"

"I just don't want to have to hurt myself again." He pulled up his sleeve and showed me his wrists. "I don't want to cut again. Sure, it lets me feel the pain I really want to feel, but it's embarrassing."

"Robbie, you won't cut again. Dr. Simmons said you're getting better."

"Yeah, but there're still nightmares. He's never gonna make those go away, is he?"

"He'll try. He'd better try! I mean, we're paying him good money per hour! He'd better try!"

A laugh from Rob. Just what I wanted. "Alright, alright, I'll go to bed." He pulled up the blanket around his shoulders, and nodded off. I turned off the TV, and pulled a blanket over myself, too.

I actually fell asleep for a while, but woke up when I heard a scream. Robbie.

"Y-you said I'm a… I'm not a fag!" I don't know who he was talking to, but it surely wasn't me.

"Robbie?" I stood up and walked over to him. I sat down and held him for a moment. "Hey, you're okay… you're fine…"

"NO!" He gripped onto my hands. I squeezed my arms tighter around him.

"Shh… Shh… Shh…" I rubbed his back gently. He quieted, but his eyes still leaked tears. "It's alright. Just go back to sleep."

I tried to stand up, but he wouldn't let me move. "Don't let go. I want… don't let go."

"Hey, hey I won't, okay?" I whispered in his ear. I pulled the blanket up over us.

"What if I have another…"

"Then wake me up. I'm not going anywhere."

Robbie smiled a little. "I love you, Beck. You and Tori both."

"I love you too, Rob. And don't think I don't have nightmares. Everyone gets them."

"Really… you do? I wouldn't ever guess."

I laughed. "Just wake me up, Rob." He yawned and closed his eyes. I closed mine, too. "I'll be right here."

**That's it! Aren't they the cutest? Just so you know, it's not supposed to be slash or brother/brother relationship. It's just brotherly love, and I think it's sweet. I really hope you liked it, and, if you can give me some pointers for my next story, that'd be cool, too. Review! Please?**


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